Take a PASS on "The Funeral Preplanning Guide"

With increasing regularity, an author or publisher requests a review and endorsement for a new book or publication related to end of life issues.

Such is the case this month with author Miri Rossitto and her two-volume "The Funeral Preplanning Guide". I received an advance copy of her work this week.


The attractive cover reminded me of the many families who have found comfort in gathering with others who grieve a loss. Pictured in darkness are four candles – showing warmth, and presumably, a shared experience.

Unfortunately, the author spends little time addressing the needs of the mourning or presenting ideas on meaningful gatherings.

Instead, she misses an opportunity to provide guidance for her readers, and does more harm than the good she could have done by doing some simple factchecking.


For instance:

Volume 1, page 17; Ms. Rossitto correctly notes that most Americans still choose a "traditional" funeral with burial in a cemetery, and goes on to enumerate the reasons people make such a decision. She concludes her remarks on the topic stating that "still others choose traditional burial because they want to their body to remain whole for as long as possible."

This statement is contrary to reality, as not a single individual of the more than three thousand I have served has ever cited their desire to be buried as a means of preserving themselves for eternity.

The fact is, that there is no amount of modern preparation by embalming, and no material type of casket that can guarantee a "whole body" without the effects of time yielding to decomposition.

Any funeral director, death educator, and yes, even author, owes the public an accurate portrayal of events that occur following death.

Ms. Rossitto continues on the very next page, suggesting that some people want to be cremated for environmental reasons.

My mother-in-law Jenny is the leading environmentalist in our family.

She has lead crusades on recycling, has turned her front yard (designating signs and all) into a nature preserve, and won't allow her neighbors to touch the leaves collecting in her yard – as they are all providing nutrients to the soil she reverently maintains.

She walks all over town, and when she must, Jenny gets into her Honda hybrid and eco- trecks to her out of town appointments.

I'm concerned that my mother-in-law would haunt me if, upon her death, we take her to our crematory and begin a process that drives off the natural elements of her body using 1,880,000 BTU's per hour of natural gas, thus turning solids into gasses releasing them into the atmosphere.

Cremation my friends, isn't environmentally friendly, after all.

Suggesting that it is, or suggesting that people choose it for environmental purposes, is irresponsible.

My advice to readers is to steer clear of this book.

If it is given to you as a gift, the best thing to do is to recycle the paper.

Don't even consider passing it along, as the author stacks inconsistencies so high, that she risks an avalanche of disappointment:

Page 39 produces a chart of disposition options, including the "free" proposition of body donation.

Ms. Rossitto fails to point out that only about 1/3 of our American population will ever be eligible to have one's body donated for scientific dissection. Medical schools regularly reject bodies that are too tall, too obese, too emaciated, too long decomposed, or too badly disfigured by trauma.

Check into body donation ahead of time as most medical schools require pre-registration for their medical program.

Those considering body donation would be wise to carefully study just how your body may be used "in the name of science" as one Ohio State University project used cadavers in place of crash-test-dummies to study the effects of dropping one's body from different elevations.

Most donors do not have this type of use in mind when signing up for medical donation.

One final point of contention is the suggestion that green burials are costing families less than other forms of burial, cremation or disposition.

The author recommends allocating a budget of about three thousand dollars for green burial expenses.

Ohio's only nature preserve cemetery won't even open a grave for this budgeted amount– contemplating the purchase price of a grave, and the time to open it with a track hoe (that's right, not the "green, dug-by-hand" proposition many expect for a green burial).

In addition to green cemetery expenses, a family choosing green burial will like still encounter costs related to storage of the body until arrangements for burial can be made and transportation from the place of death to the cemetery.

As an approved member of the Green Burial Council, we serve well those who seek an environmentally responsible disposition.

My experience is that the cost of a green burial is not necessarily less than that of conventional burial.

Just as the purchase of organic goods at the grocery store come at a premium, Green Burial Council approved embalming fluid does indeed cost about twice the price of the traditional, mass produced chemical injection embalming fluid.

I extend an invitation to Ms. Rossitto to contact us before she publishes her next guide to helping families. We welcome the opportunity to educate people about their options to ensure that wise decisions are made without the cloud of urgent, hasty decisions that sometimes lead to regret.


Abraham Lincoln said it best "You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today." - Pre planning with your family remains one of the most thoughtful gifts you can provide; a roadmap to the future, at the exact moment they will not be able to ask you a question, they will discover that you've provided an answer.

It's that cool.

(I've seen the look of relief on the faces of family members when I share the good news that mom took the time to put her affairs in order).

Go ahead – investigate your choices related to planning your farewell.

Just be sure that any research you do is actually fact-checked, instead of irresponsibly passing along information without credibly vetting the source. We wish Ms. Rossitto better luck in her next project, and stand ready to assist her as we would anyone, in demystifying end of life decisions.


Brian Hanner is a board licensed Ohio funeral director and a Certified Thanatologist by the Association of Death Education and Counseling. He and his wife, Anne, own and operate the Geib Funeral Homes, Crematories and Remembrance Centers of New Philadelphia and Dover, Ohio.